Well. After weeks of abstination from training due to a torn achilles the date for the Grim Challenge has come around again following its postponement. What postponement I hear you say? Well read on dear friend and all shall be revealed!
The Grim Challenge was due to be held on the 5th of December 2010 during the coldest 2 weeks since records began. Snow fell and the country ground to a stand still. I had wisely(?) decided to install a central heating system in our house through this period, the timing not exactly being the best! How was I to know it was going to be sub zero temperatures and I would be without heating the whole time?!? The family moved out to the in laws (thanks again Ryan and Steph) and I got on with the task in hand, removing all our electric storage heaters in preparation for installing the central heating system. Half way into this deep freeze was the day for the Grim. The snow had covered the ground in inches of white stuff and I was sleeping in a cold house cuddling up to an electric plug in heater lent to me by the Out Laws, looking forward with trepidation to the event the next day in minus 7-8 degrees centigrade. The night before the run I checked the official web site to find that they had cancelled the event and rescheduled it for the 15th Jan due to not being able to get the support teams/equipment etc to the event site. A stay of execution then. Best get on with the central heating then!
Come the 14th Jan the family have been back in a warm centrally heated house since before Xmas but my achilles still has not improved so very little training has been undertaken. Sod it. Stop moaning Frank and get on with it!
The morning of the event arrives and off I go leaving the family at home (the wife is far too sensible to be standing around in the cold cheering me on when she could be sat in a nice warm house with a cup of tea)! I pull up in the car park approximately an hour before the start with lots of other people who all spring out of their cars and dash off to the event start. I get out, then get straight the feck back in again. Despite it being about 15 degrees warmer than when the event was originally planned for it's still bloody cold and windy out there and I'm going to take advantage of the warmth of my car for as long as possible! Fifteen or 20 minutes or so later all those eager people who dashed off to the start come back all shivery and cold and get back into their cars too! Ha!
15 minutes to go and I make my move and head to the start. I Join the big crowd just before the start line and we are all hopping about trying to keep warm, then we're off! There's some army bloke running on my left who purposefully takes a running dive into the first big mud puddle we come across, then speeds off like he's got a flea up his arse! Nutter. I think I'll pace myself.
Jostling for position and tripping up over everyone else as there's possibly a couple of thousand people running in the event I'm following a pair of wobbly buttocks as we get into our pace. Running through, well I hesitate to call them puddles because that doesn't quite do them justice, more like mini mud filled lakes, I cover the first 4 miles with no problem. Under a camo net we go then JESUS! That's a steep hill! No one told me we would be bloody climbing up a 2 in 1 gradient! Shut up your griping and get on with it baldy! The organisers have taken the trouble to name a couple of the lakes, this next one is invitingly called "The Crater". Hmm... Looks like I'm going for a swim then.
Out we get and crack on. I leave the wobbly buttocks behind. Hey! Look! There's Santa running along. Hi Santa. You're supposed to be having a few months off, what are you doing out here? Same thing as that bloke in a Dalmatian outfit and those two guys in the Rubik cube costumes I suppose. Hmm, those wobbly buttocks look familiar. How did you get ahead of me again? Pedal to the metal. What's that sign up ahead say? "Crawl Forest, CRAWL!" This doesn't bode well. Its another camo net with everyone going under it. Sounds like screaming... Oh sh%t. It is essentially a 15-20 metre long quick sand pit under camo netting. We have to fight our way through it. I'm literally up to my neck in mud/quick sand, stopping myself from sinking into the mire by holding onto the netting above me and using it to pull myself through the shite. I'm screaming "FU%£*NG HAVE IT!!" at the top of my voice. This is VERY cold. Taken my breath away. Some bloke next to me goes down and almost under so me and another guy grab him and pull him back up. Then I'm out the other side and running again, laughing! Ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa! Man I am covered in it! That's soon solved with the next lake/puddle! Seven mile marker comes up and I'm feeling a bit tired now. The lack of training due to injury is beginning to show. Grit your teeth boy and suck it up! Overtake army nutter. I can hear the tannoy going at the finish line, sweet. Seems like I've been running for ages before I see it. Hang on, we're running past it? What? Eh? Bastards! They make you run past the finish line and then in a big loop for another half mile or so! In pain now. The Achilles is letting me know about it! Bystanders at the sides of the track cheering people on through the final puddle/lakes and across the finish line!
I am absolutely knackered, legs on fire,soaking wet, covered in mud and quite pleased with myself. Well done mate. Gonna sign up for it next year?...I reckon so!
I came 526th with a time of 1:20:09 out of 1948 runners. Quite chuffed with myself. Reckon you can do better? Bring it on, and sign up with me for the next one...
